Why is it so important what others think of me? How (if so) do I explain where I currently am and what's going on with me? Why can I accept on others that depressions are an illness? Why do I think that my own depression is nothing but my own weakness, my own fault, the result of being unable to live my life?
btw: I should have used them for the letter Q - these are a lot of questions!
And another one: Why do we set different standards on others than on ourselves? - I don't know. I do. And that's wrong!
Not the first time I think that's also a problem made by the public, because depressions have still that stigmata. What if the public could really see and accept depressions as a true illness? What if I could see my own depression as a true illness?
It's so weird even when I'm dealing with this for quite a while now this particular message hasn't sunken in! But it is so important what I think of myself, then I wouldn't mind so much what others think of me, right?
At the moment I try to find the right words for myself. How would I explain myself my illness?
I'm playing with the metaphor of a car. Our body is like a car. There might be some predispositions, because of our genes, e.g. if your mother or grandmother had depressions the procentage is higher that you also could be susceptible for it (See also G for Genes). Pertaining to cars: the whole series could have some kind of problems and you can't change this.
Okay, the brain needs dopamine and serotonin to work correctly, like a car would need gasoline or oil. If the gasoline is now of minor quality or the oil old, it can't work right and - important - it's not the fault of the car!
The driver can prevent those 'accidents' by brining the car regularly to inspection, in case of depressions suitable regular medication helps the ill body to run better.
Well, I think I should continue working on this metaphor until I can 100% accept that depressions are an illness. Then I can better think of me, too, and can always argue right.
I can't help it: What do you think?
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